Help I Hate My Husband!

It's a scary feeling to go from wanting to make a baby with the man you love, to suddenly hating him, hating being near him, having to speak to him.

This was something that effected me so badly with my four children. I kept thinking I had made a massive mistake. After the birth of my first child I was diagnosed with PND and was prescribed medication, but I was afraid that if I took them they would take my baby away, so I battled through, not really having any understanding of what PND was and what it was doing to me.

I hated sharing my baby with my partner, every time he opened his mouth I would think that he was having a go at me, that he was only staying with me for the sake of our child.

Sudden outburst, fits of crying and anger are all down to one main thing…. Hormones! And stress! Suddenly you are going mad with the changes going on in your body, suffering nausea and sickness 27/7, tired and basically feeling like shit, whilst our partners get to do what they always do, we start resenting the fact that nothing for them is changing, they can still go out and socialise, eat and drink what they like,it's so frustrating.

The biggest issue we face as a women is the old age myth that all women are ‘over joyed and blooming, sailing through a perfect pregnancy, have a perfect labour and be the wonderful, perfect mother’, often the reality is too much to bare and we become anxious thinking that we are ‘not right’, ‘the baby isn't right’, ‘how on earth will I cope being a mum?’, ‘what have I done?’ Etc etc

It's ok. Remember, it's 9 months, it seems a life time, but once you have that little bundle of joy, 9 months will shoot past far too quick. I know this doesn't mean much when you are feeling the way you do, but you are normal. So many women go though the same as you at this stage.

Here are some little methods for coping…..

- Click on the free link and tap along with me. Eft is such an amazing tool, and really helped me through my pregnancies and depressions.

- Do the energy exercises, these not only help you physically, mentally & energetically but they can help you bond with your baby. They can feel your energy within!

- Never feel guilty for the way you feel, it won't last and its normal.

- Make a date with yourself, treat yourself to a hair cut, get your nails done, have a prenatal massage, sit out sit with the sun on your face. Have a cuppa with a friend. Do something that makes you feel happy inside.

- Tell your husband how you feel, show him this blog

- Let your husband know how you feel, but that you do love him, it's a scary thing for them seeing the changes in you

- Be with people who make you feel good. Don't be alone, be with your friends that lift you. Sit in a café and people watch.

- Look at the positive not the negative.

- Book a date night, something you can both enjoy

- Keeping a journal helped me to write down how I felt

- If your feelings get worse, or even if they don't get worse, book an appointment with me and have a tailored appointment that will leave you feeling like new

- Have some reiki, it's beautiful for you and baby, helps bond and aids with labour

- Keep yourself hydrated & grounded

- Swimming and gentle walking

- Acupressure

- Use a hand held stress ball and squeeze it when around your husband

- Meditation and deep breathing

During one of my pregnancies I suffered with psychosis and was certain that my husband was plotting to steal the children away from me once I had given birth, of course this was all in my mind, but at the time it was so real.

Look out for tapping scripts and exercise provided to help lift you now. One and one sessions are available from me via the clinic or Skype. You are not alone, and everything you are experiencing is so normal.

About the Author Jeani Howard

Jeani is an award winning therapist, healer, author and speaker. Jeani has on her own journey of healing overcome PTSD, clinical depression and agonising anxiety. A mother of 4 who suffered with birth trauma and pre and post natal depression, now prides herself on having worked with 1000's of adults, adolescents and women through pregnancy, labour and their transition into motherhood.

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